STRENGTH FROM WEAKNESS
In these distressing moments, we lay our brokenness before God. This advances us toward the goal of knowing Him because a broken spirit dissolves the wall of self-sufficiency that separates us from God. If we're to develop a familiar friendship with God, we cannot separate ourselves from Him during pain and temptation. The lifetime process of transformation involves God purging us of our tendency to push Him away and His wooing us into union with Him and His loving will for the world.
In the New Testament, it was the broken who came to know Jesus. Think of the woman who had hemorrhaged for twelve years, desperate, having spent all her money but finding no cure. Coming up behind Jesus, she quietly felt the edge of His cloak (Mark 5:25-34). Like her, we can use our brokenness to finally accept that our bag of tricks for living life is not nifty enough. No amount of self-help books will rescue us. No more "looking good kid" facades - we freely admit our pain and temptation to God. Our failures strip us of self-protection, making us vulnerable to God, just as the cured woman fell at Jesus' feet, trembled with fear, and told Him the "whole truth" before the crowd of people (Mark 5:33).
Perhaps you can accept that we can find closeness with God in times of irritation and anguish, but you wonder what they hav to do with enjoying God's presence. Enjoyment comes from receiving pleasure, but it also comes from appreciating the benefits of deepening our intimacy. When we confess our shortcomings to God, we can enjoy His presence because we know that God's love envelops us in spite of our flaws. No one else so completely understands, loves, and challenges us. This familiar friendship doesn't take away the pain or temptation, but it gives us the strength to stand firm.
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