I never minded the coarse language in some of the workout music played at gyms or when my friends work out. I didn't mind working out to them too.
But just a few minutes ago, the coarse language in music that came with my workout video got me angry at people - my mom and friends who talk to me past 1am, so angry I started judging them and harping on their faults. I couldn't fire up much power for my high-intensity exercise and I blamed them for my poor performance today. I got really agitated.
So agitated I couldn't continue the workout.
And I went to pray.
It's not the music's fault because I entertained those angry thoughts and let them start taking root in me. At the same time, the mental image of a shouty strong (wo)man isn't something that I want to emulate in my mind when I lift those weights or do those high knees. At the most superficial level, it's unattractive. At a less superficial level, I'm just deepening those associations my mind already has between muscle and violence - as if we haven't had enough of that!
And in my surprising case of getting angry at specific people, it's also going to take quite some time to rectify these spur-of-the-moment accusations I conjured with my imaginative mind. Sure, they may just be thoughts, but these terrible thoughts can show up later in the way I interpret the attitude and behavior of my mom and friends whom I text with very late at night. And all that judging? Oh yes, it'll show up in the way I talk to them and think about them for sure.
So now I just wonder, why is agitative music such a popular method for people in the gym to generate physical strength? Are there other ways?
One good thing though...my poor performance today is making a chronic under-sleeper like me hate late nights, so yay!
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