judgmentalism

Our research with Christians confirms that often we miss the point of reflecting Jesus to outsiders because we are too busy catering to the expectations of other believers. One church leader explained how a few vocal members of his church prevented him from partnering with another local congregation because the potential partner was "too seeker sensitive." Another believer explained how her efforts to engage people affected by HIV/AIDS have been routinely vilified by some Christians because of the perception that she is being manipulated by homosexual activists. A young Christian leader who developed an inner-city ministry told me how one of his board members questioned whether there were "too many black kids" attending. One influential Christian leader was roundly criticized for engaging in a respectful dialogue with advocates of a different faith. 

unChristian (2007)

David Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons 

I have forgotten many but here are pieces of advice Christians have offered to me that has stuck around in my head.

"Don't go to Little India. There are many foreign workers there."

"Why go to poor countries? You've nowhere better to spend your money?"

"Be careful of the poor people. They have headlice."

"Stop thinking about Muslims. You'll get into trouble."

In my heart, I was rolling my eyes at these comments, and I felt they were not insulting me, but the Jesus whom they profess to follow...the same Jesus who hung out with traitors, thieves, prostitutes, the demonized, the sick and dying - those who were considered the 'sinners' and filthy people of his society.

Reading this, I was like, "Yes, totally! If only these people would read what David Kinnaman is saying."  Especially when one of them continues to be the self-appointed Gestapo of his/her church and rather vocal commentator on Facebook about sensational local news. Interacting with him/her can sometimes be frustrating.

But I know that I have my own share of prejudice and judgmentalism, often in order to shield myself from being vulnerable to people who may (again) exploit my willingness to show my flaws. Or just a plain unwillingness to show people that I don't have it all together - who does anyway? For fear that what I believe to be true may be unduly and unsoundly refuted. This isn't like Jesus, isn't it? I'm not trusting that he vindicates and heals me. It's not supposed to be me acting on my own efforts and suspicion of others. 

You may be saying, "What terrible people you have been talking about!" But you are just as bad, and you have no excuse! When you say they are wicked and should be punished, you are condemning yourself, for you do these very same things...Don't you realize how kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Or don't you care? Can't you see how kind he has been in giving you time to turn from your sin?

Romans 2: 1,4

And now it's time for me to make an overdue apology to someone.