Dearest God

For 12 years I had learned to believe that you were always out to punish me for any wrong I did. Never would I have thought that I would be one of those people whom I thought were believing in such a scary and unbiblical God. 

It's become a habit for me to always try and find out what doesn't please you, because I'm afraid of more punishment. Do you know how hard I have been on myself all these years? Do you know how heavy and crushing this burden has been?

But now I know. Now I know that this is a lie. Renew my eyes...the way I see you. You have never-ending grace that you give to us freely. You have a much bigger heart than I have always believed you to be. Sorry for thinking that you were stingy, had a narrow heart and a bad temper. It sounds funny now! But it wasn't for the past 12 years -

:'( 

Prince of Peace, thank you for setting me free. I feel so much lighter now. Who would have thought that I could be set free from this prison? You are much more supportive of and in love with me than I have always believed.

:')

"Your precious words intoxicate 

A heart that aches; it's ok"