tummy ache and hair perm

So my tummy was bloated and hurt the whole of last night, and in the morning I was jolted awake to do things that are usually associated with food poisoning. Today is a holiday alright, a holiday spent alternating between the bed and the toilet...much more than I had wanted. But I realized Jesus gave me a nice natural perm for my hair from all that tossing and turning last night. And that is not what you would associate with a painful tummy, or a dreadful day.

I laughed when I saw myself in the mirror. Jesus, I love your humor! And how you cheer me up.

things i used to hear growing up

A mixture of lores, sayings, teachings and beliefs (probably of good intent)

1. If you point at the moon,
a) your ears will be cut off, or
b) your tongue will be cut off, or
c) your finger will be cut off.

2. If you have nightmares, sleep on the underside of your pillow.
*a Malay taxi driver's advice in 2011

3. If the soles of your shoes face upwards when you take them off at someone's doorstep, spirits will follow you home.

4. Don't bring Muslim and Hindu friends home because
a)  they will bring kutu ('headlice') into our house
b) they are not Christian

5. If you trim your nails at night, you will see spirits.
*The irony: a Malaysian relative was amazed at my courage to go ahead nonetheless. He/she also said because I didn't believe in this lore, I wouldn't see the spirits.

6. My primary school used to be a cemetery, so was my secondary school.
*But it turns out that everyone's primary schools and secondary schools were also cemeteries. All those years of feeling special...

7. If you choked on a fishbone, keep stabbing a pair of chopsticks against the bottom of an empty rice bowl.

8. If you sleep in front of a mirror, your soul will be captured into the mirror.

9. Peel an apple in front of the mirror at midnight and you will see
a) your crush, or
b) your future boyfriend, or
c) your future husband, or
d) a ghost, or
c) a witch

10. Don't play with Indians because
a) they are smelly, or
b) they have kutu, or
c) you will become BLACK

In the name of cute folklore, I developed two of my own and have been propagating them to anyone who would hear them. 

11. Your breakfast tomorrow is what your fart smells like today.
If your fart smells like hotdog, it means you're having hotdogs for breakfast tomorrow.

12. If you find a piece of hair in your food, congratulations - you're in luck!
Better still if it's a bug!!!

Speaking of which, I just found one in my soup. 

new year's greetings

Me as the devil wishing you:

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

some funny no-brainers

A mini-vomit of comics from my favorite people: ToothpasteforDinner and NatalieDee.


toothpastefordinner.com


toothpastefordinner.com


toothpastefordinner.com


nataliedee.com


nataliedee.com


nataliedee.com


nataliedee.com


nataliedee.com


nataliedee.com

Too cute!

Anthropology 395B

Two of Kristeva's interests seem to coincide with our own: the creation of subordinate groups through positioning in language (Kristeva is especially interested in women), and the disruption of the process through which such positioning is habitually achieved.

Dick Hebdige, Subculture: The meaning of style (1979)

Thanks Dick, but why would want I to know if Kristeva is especially interested in women. And her interest in women does not coincide with mine.

Quotes of the day

"Any idiot, any total fool can post anything on the Internet."
Dr Classen, on looking for sources

"A god that lets us prove its existence is an idol."
Dietrich bon Hoeffer, Lutheran pastor killed for the Hitler assassination attempt

Thoughts:
effective and respectful pedagogy
immanence embodied by Christ
Boethian happiness
listen, listen, listen
love in wisdom
God's grace

And lastly, this super cute and hilarious illustration of a wrist accupoint you can press to reduce motion sickness. Credits go to Yingjie.

LOL!

Tea Partay and Ivy Leaguers

"but they are just jealous cos' our parents run the nation"

cookie is a sometime food

"Yeah ok, I do evyting"

Spice Girl Auditions: Swan Spice

I live in Singapura

My dear country

Haha pictures

The permanent solution to the unpalatably pallid appearance of sample food display sets


Many hands make light work.


No one would really blame you if you eat at your wound, blood, thrombi and all.


Cow and Chicken


He needs braces and some other lipstick colour.


Poor guy! I know, I pity him too.


Major fashion faux pas...at least in the part of the world where I'm at!


I'm seriously, absolutely, overwhelmingly convinced that this is the a major reason why people take the back seat in cabs.


Looks like ginseng.


And my good ol' friend, The Bass. How can I forget him in his cavemen party wear!

Dummy's Guide to Flag Days

My last minute efforts of some spring cleaning has paid off. I fished out my journal that I wrote in Secondary 4 and I'm proud that I gave the impression (and was!) a goody-two-shoes. : ) I'm kinda bored, my jogging plans postponed by the threatening weather. So I'll post a nonsensical entry as well haha.

The Dummy's Guide to Flag Days

by Daphne Tan

Have had nerve-wreckingly frustating experiences pestering people for their 50cents and 20cents? No fear! These tried-and-tested tactics will leave you contented with tins of cash overflowing.

1. Approach people who either have wallets in hand, or are digging for something in their bags and pockets. They'll feel quite obliged to give you money.

2. Once the target is spotted, pretend to look around while advancing towards him. Only give him eye contact within approachable distance, so he cannot run away.

3. Sneak from behind!

4. Approach for people stuck in queues - they can't run away!

5. Choose your targets wisely. If you're good-looking, try looking for older folks of the opposite sex. These ah peks and aunties will be inclined to give money for the sake of your mesmerising smile.

Someone! Help me, I'm very very bored. Two more days without work? It's driving me crazy.